Jealous or Justified is a monthly segment where we ask our readers to analyze the situation of someone who has asked for our help to see if the person is being Jealous or are they Justified in feeling the way they feel.

Please keep in mind that the term “Jealous” can mean many things in the context of this segment. It doesn’t and won’t always mean jealous in its true meaning. Perhaps the person is just in their feeling a bit too much.

I never expected to find myself in this position. In my small town, where everyone seems to know everyone else’s business, I fell hard for a woman who felt like someone I could truly see a future with. But that vision came crashing down when I learned that one of my associates had been involved with her casually, and, to complicate things even more, I found out she’s active on websites seeking a “sugar daddy” or “friends with benefits.” Now, I’m left wondering if it’s time to move on — or if my feelings are strong enough to overlook what I’ve discovered.

The truth is, I’m no angel myself. I’ve made my fair share of questionable choices, and I know what it’s like to feel judged. So, part of me feels it’s hypocritical to pass judgment on her. But even with that perspective, I can’t help but feel conflicted. The trust I felt and the vision I had for us don’t feel the same anymore, and I wonder if I’ll ever truly see her in the same light.

This dilemma has me questioning my own standards and whether I’m holding her to an expectation I wouldn’t meet myself. Can I accept her with her flaws? Or is it unfair to expect that kind of acceptance from myself, knowing my own limits?

At the end of the day, I need to protect my own self-respect and happiness. Maybe it’s not about “judgment” but about recognizing that our goals and values don’t align. It’s hard to let go, but I’m wondering if holding on is simply a recipe for more heartbreak down the road.

To those who might be in a similar spot, I’d ask: when do you choose to hold on, and when do you let go? Sometimes, letting go isn’t about failing to forgive but about being honest with yourself.