“Jealous or Justified is a monthly segment where we ask our readers to analyze the situation of someone who has asked for our help to see if the person is being Jealous or are they Justified in feeling the way they feel.

Please keep in mind that the term “Jealous” can mean many things in the context of this segment.It doesn’t and won’t always mean jealous in its true meaning. Perhaps the person is just in their feeling a bit too much.

Mary and I have been Friends since we were both twelve years old.

She was always more advanced than me socially, for example she had a Boyfriend at thirteen. My parents weren’t having any of that. So, my life was piano lessons, school and going to church on Sunday.

In High School Mary gained quite a reputation for being sexually active in the ninth grade. Because she was my best friend some of our classmates assumed I was like that too but it wasn’t long before they knew I was different than my BFF.

In the summer going into our junior year she started dating a guy named Glen. He was average looking but a really nice guy.He was a straight A student with a bright future. I honestly didn’t see what attracted them to each other.

Besides being very conservative Glen came from a strong upper middle class family. Glen was crazy about Mary also. He was so nice to her.

One day I asked her did she like him and she said “he gets on my nerves, he tells me he likes me too much, I don’t require that type of attention.”

I tried to tell her that she may not appreciate it now but someday you will. She even called him a sucker and explained that they had never even had sex and he still gives her anything she wants. I tried to explain to her that’s because he really loves you. But she said she knew twelve others guys that loved her also. So after three years Glen just gave up and eventually they broke up.

After high school Mary and I grew apart. I went off to college and she moved to Miami with another guy who was a friend of her cousin.

In the summer I would always see Glen, he was studying to be a Attorney like his Father and Grandfather were and I was studying Finance.

By pure chance we both ended up pursuing our graduate degrees at the same school in California.

Coming from the same town and not knowing anyone in California we gravitated towards each other. We studied together and it grew from there. It took a year or so, but I started to have real feelings for Glen. We talked about Mary and he said he knew deep down inside she was playing him all along but at the time he really loved her and hoped she’d see the value in that but she never did.

I certainly see his value. Here’s a Man that’s kind and loving and he treats me like I’m important to him. But more then that, he has become my best friend. I can’t count the times he encouraged me when I was down, Glen is a wonderful Man and any Woman would be lucky to have him.

On our graduation day Glen asked me to marry him, I said yes. The last two and a half years have been like a fairytale. We both have great careers and just purchased our first home.

Shortly after we got married, my Dad passed away so Glen and I went home to bury my father.

When we got home I went to Walmart to get some things and my old friend Mary was working there. The first thing she noticed was my ring, she commented “Girl looks like you got yourself a Baller” I smiled and said I sure do.

She went on to tell me she had two kids now and how their father doesn’t help her like he should. She invited me out for a drink after she got off and I reluctantly accepted.

At the bar I told her that Glen and I had gotten married. She immediately got angry and started calling me every name in the book. She accused me of stealing her man and claims that she wants him back. Her rant went on and on.

After she finished, I reminded her of her behavior; how she disrespected him, cheated on him and took advantage of his kindness. I told her it was her fault that they were no longer together. But she would not hear it. She refused to take any responsibility for her actions in their break up years ago.

When I got home, I told Glen what happened, he tried to calm me down stating “we know the truth, forget her.

But since that conversation with Mary, I started to think, "did I broke the “Girl Code” or is she just tripping?"

Please help me, is she Jealous or Justified in her feelings?!

Jealous or Justified